I probably should be really upset about our finances and the economy, but I’m not.
Maybe my lack of panic has something to do with finally emerging (yesterday) from my insane quest to conquer the Pit of Despair which had also been doubling as my bedroom for the past two years. (And, yes, my quest was most triumphant, but not without much swearing, sore muscles, and curses on my husband who was out-of-town at the time of my ambitious endeavor.) It could be the euphoria of finally tackling what felt like the impossible, or it could just be that I’m just too darn exhausted to wrap my mind around reality. Or maybe I’m just being dumb about it all.
In any case, I’m feeling pretty good.
Today, as I looked over the spreadsheets that outlined our debts, I realized that none of our positives–our very small retirement, home equity, and value of the cars–were financially enumerated. Granted, the cars depreciate and, in this economy, so do housing values, but they are not worth nothing. My college education cannot be repossessed, and it gives me earning power if I need to go back to full-time work outside the home in addition to my current freelance work.
My house needs many repairs that I cannot afford to do for a few years. However, I live in a rural area surrounded by farms and, across the street, a house that is in such disrepair that the children of the grandparents who once lived in it are working on tearing it down as I write this. I’m in the fortunate position that, in my case, I have one of the nicest homes on the street…I don’t have to worry about keeping up with the Joneses. (Okay, I still cringe over the siding…I admit, I don’t want people thinking that my family is a bunch of hillbillies just because my house is one step up from the one in Green Acres.) This ol’ house may not look like much, but it has a newer roof that keeps us dry, new plumbing and heating that keeps us warm, large rooms, and a six-acre playground for the kids.
This weekend I sorted through all the hand-me-downs for the kids. As I’m surrounded by piles of clothes it’s hard to feel like we are really suffering. When I did the bedroom project I either used Freecycle or the Salvation Army to donate many unused items to others. While I did get a tax receipt for my donation to the Salvation Army, I still thought how lucky I am to be in a position to be giving and not in need. I also found a lot of things that were buried for which we’ve been looking. Plus, now my bedroom feels like a retreat rather than a place I crash and leave and close the door behind me as quickly as possible.
I could continue on about how we’re all healthy and all the great things we can do that doesn’t cost much money, etc., but you get the idea so I’ll leave it at that.
Lest you think I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person with a sunny disposition, let me assure you: the first thoughts in my head about any situation is usually negative and discouraging. It is so easy to go there.
But “going there” is not productive.
What is productive is looking at the assets you have to work with and start from there. Yes, sometimes you don’t have enough assets to get you where you need to go. Yes, it’s perfectly normal to be sad and angry and depressed about it. But, ultimately, you’ve got to do something about it; sad and angry and depressed won’t change anything for you or the situation.
Everyone has assets. How are you using yours? You might think they are so insignificant they aren’t worth remembering. But that attitude will not serve your life. Don’t belittle any of them; each in its own way can add value.
Today, instead of reviewing all your challenges you’ve got to get through for the day, week, month, year, etc., first make a list of all your assets–your talents, your resources, your blessings, etc. Then, look to see how those assets can help you solve your problems.
Like I said, our family–along with just about everyone in the country–is facing a financial brick wall. I certainly am very concerned about it. My husband is stressed and nervous. But I also see it as a challenge to overcome, one that won’t ultimately kill us. I also figure I may as well have some fun with it. Yup, you read that right…fun! It’s a project…how creative can I be to solve this problem? Can I think outside the box and come up with new ideas? If I were someone else, how would I see this problem? Instead of thinking about the levels of deprivation we may need to go to, I think instead of how I can beat the system. I am an educated, creative woman…I should apply my joy of learning and researching skills to fix or at least manage the issue. Again, I’m not Pollyanna about this. However, I am making a decision about my attitude. I can be depressed or determined. Which one is preferable?
Ultimately, I’m pig-headed. In this case, I hope it as an asset.
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