TAKING CARE OF YOU: A Woman’s Worth in Business

A dame that knows the ropes isn’t likely to get tied up. ~May West

I am a Professional Family Manager. I am also a freelance editor and graphic artist whose niche is small businesses and non-profits who cannot afford or may not need the services of a large marketing firm but still desires to have quality marketing materials (as opposed to desktop-published materials). My time on a project or with a client is usually short and job-specific, although I do generate some repeat business. My fees are also less than those of a marketing firm as my overhead is less and the work I do is usually less involved. The quality of my work is excellent, however, and I charge accordingly.

I’ve noticed a recurring trend with many of my newer clients: instead of viewing me as a professional for hire, clients see me as a stay-at-home-mom for whom they are being generous as to give me their business, and, therefore, I should both 1)provide work for free beyond the stated contract terms and 2)be willing to accept less money for a project. I never advertise the fact that I even have kids, as I work to keep my private life from my professional life, but I live in a small community so many of my clients at the very least know of me before they hire me.

One example: recently I was approached by an out-of-state small business who was referred to me by another client regarding creating a simple website, brochure, etc. I told the business owner that I was a local-area contractor but, as a favor to the person who referred me, I would be willing to do the work. That same day I emailed him an itemized contract, to which he agreed via email. Within forty-eight hours I had the proofs ready for him, which he liked an asked for a few simple modifications. The modifications were made, and then he wanted another change. Then another. Then he forgot that he wanted some other pictures and information included in the materials, which required a complete redesign. I pointed out that, as per the contract terms, I would charge by the hour for the redesign. Of course he objected. He also complained that I did not have a fax number (why he needed one I still do not know). When I held my ground about the contract terms, he told me, “If you’re really serious about your business, you’ll get your head out of being a mom and focus on your clients. If you don’t do what it takes to keep your clients you’re going to go under.”

Excuse me?!?!?

The person who referred me to this client told him I have three children and freelance. Supposedly that gave him the impression that I was 1)not as qualified to do the work; 2)could be persuaded (guilted) into doing more work because having children disqualified me from being a professional; and 3)cheap.

Apparently this businessman is not the only one who thinks this way.

In April 2008, Sue Shellenbarger of the Wall Street Journal wrote about “SWAT Moms” –i.e., “Smart Women with Available Time Moms.” Former business women who are staying home with their children–and apparently have time on their hands, according to the article–are increasingly being hired by companies as freelancers for a fraction of their former salaries to do sometimes the same amount of work…only with greater time flexibility and without the overhead. The article quotes companies gleefully stating how happy they are with paying low rates for professional work, and how surprised they are that mothers could actually do good professional work. The author suggests mothers are happy to take less pay because their goal is not income but keeping their skills fresh. The article reports a win-win situation for everyone.

For me, this article was depressing. Why? Because this is not an empowerment of moms…but exploiting them as a new cheap labor source. Once again, the skills, intelligence, and performance of women is being diminished…and many of us are going along with it.

Now, I’m not arguing that part-time, freelance contractors must be paid the exact same amount as a their full-time counterparts. I’m also not arguing against contractors being financially competitive in our free-market society.

I am against the article’s take that 1) stay-at-home-mothers have a lot of free time on their hands, and 2) mothers are willing to spend it doing cheap work just to keep their business skills fresh.

Quite frankly, I’m insulted–and not just by the erroneous assertion that moms who are at home aren’t doing anything, or by the claim that mothers just want to have something to put on a resume.

I am insulted by the implication that mothers have so little self-esteem over being at home with their children that they have to look for validation by doing freelance professional work outside the home, and are so desperate for it they will do the work on the cheap.

If women want to be taken seriously in business, women have to take themselves seriously; that includes charging clients a reasonable amount of money for the work performed. When you charge ridiculously low rates for your work, your client will see that you do not take your work or yourself seriously, nor that you consider your work comparable to that of a full-time professional…and the client will treat you as such.

Mothers–if you do not want society to treat you as a second-class citizen, then don’t treat yourself like one. You can’t expect respect from anyone if you don’t have it yourself.

My primary job is being a mother, which leaves me little to no available free time.

My secondary job is a freelance editor and graphic designer, which I do in order to earn money which our family needs. My goal is an income. My work is of the same quality as one working full-time in the field; having three children for whom I care has not changed my editing and graphic design skills. I simply have fewer contracts and therefore spend less time working away from the family.

So how did I handle my client? I told him the way I keep my business profitable is to not donate my time and resources but to charge for my work, and his requested changes would take X hours and cost X dollars. I didn’t even get into the comment that I was a mother–it was unprofessional for him to bring it up, and would have been unprofessional of me to argue the point with him. He (grudgingly) agreed to the fee, I sent him an invoice, he authorized the work via email, and the work was completed. I had enough respect for myself and my work that I was willing to risk losing future business from him; I also had enough respect for my family not to take time from them and give it to this client for free. *

I’m a dame who tries to knows the ropes. I at least know what I’m worth professionally. That’s why my client couldn’t tie me up.

Every mother should have the same self-respect for what they do, both at home and in their business…and never sell themselves short in either respect.

*(I also mentally questioned myself the whole time I was doing it, because I am, after all, a woman, and I like keeping people happy and don’t like confrontation…but I knew, logically, it had to be done. I had to say “No.” Even when it’s the right thing to do and you know it’s the right thing to do, it’s still a hard thing to do. That’s why there are so many people making money from self-help books telling people how to say it–if it were easy I wouldn’t even be writing this post.)

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